Homesickness:
advice for parents

We do everything we can to help children and teens to settle in and have a happy, healthy time at our English language summer school.

Shortly after arrival, we will give everyone a tour of the school, so they are familiar with their new environment. They will meet the friendly ECS team and we make sure everyone understands the timetable, routines and rules.

With lots of fun activities, games and social ice-breakers, everyone will soon feel comfortable with each other and begin to make friends. And by providing warm, friendly adult support, your child will have plenty support if they need it.

These steps all help our pupils feel comfortable and confident in the ECS environment. There is a number of things you can do before and during the course to support your child too:

Prepare your child to spend time away

If your child is not used to spending time away from home, especially overnight, try to provide some opportunities to do so before the course. Visits to family and friends, ideally for more than one night can really help prepare them for spending their summer at ECS.

Bedtimes at ECS may be different to what your child is used to. If possible, try to get your child into a new time routine in the days before coming to the school. This will help avoid the possibility of them lying awake because bedtime is earlier, triggering feelings of loneliness or homesickness.

Remember: children travelling from different time zones will take a few days for their body to adapt to the new eating and sleeping times.

Talk about the course and how it can feel to be away

Unfamiliar routines and environment are a primary cause of homesickness. It can therefore be very helpful to talk to your child about the course so they are already familiar with what the ECS summer camp will be like before they arrive.

There is a lot of information about accommodation, lessons, trips, sports and our social programme, as well as  example daily and weekly timetables, across the website that you can look at together.

Talk to your child about how they might feel while they are away. Recognise that it's normal to miss home but be positive too! It can also help to explain what homesickness might feel like – some children think it means being physically sick. And be sure to tell your child to talk to an adult at ECS, e.g. a house parent, if they feel sad or uncomfortable in any way. They will be able to help.

If you send children together, don’t put responsibility on one child to look after the other. We will provide support for every child. Allow all your children the same freedom to have a good time and make their own friends without having to worry about a younger sibling, for example.

You can also watch videos on our YouTube channel so your child can see ECS and Port Regis before their trip, or follow us on Instagram and Facebook.

Stay positive and lead by example

Try not to treat your child too differently in the days before their trip. Farewell parties and visits from relatives may be well-meaning but can cause anxiety.

Avoid saying things like “we'll all miss you so much while you're gone. It won't be the same here without you”. While this may be true, it might make the child feel guilty. Instead, try to talk about your child’s trip in positive ways: “I’m sure you’re going to have a great time. Take lots of photos and we’ll want to hear all about it when you get back!”

Please do not tell children that they can come home if they don’t like the school. While it is of course possible for pupils to leave early, this is rarely necessary and saying so can lead to a negative attitude and even become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Try to have an alternative to “goodbye” when it is time to leave your child. A reference to the next time of contact is better: “have fun and we’ll see you soon.” Depart swiftly when you have decided to go and put on a brave face. It's not uncommon for children to be tearful when it comes to saying goodbye but are fine when you have gone.

When a child is homesick

If a child is homesick, our experienced and caring staff will do everything they can to reassure and comfort them, letting them know that it is normal and shifting their focus to what they are excited about on the UK summer camp.

We will talk to you, the child, other pupils and staff to understand how they are feeling and what they need, as well as to make sure there are no other problems. With everyone informed, our team will be able to provide friendly, professional support to help them to overcome their homesickness.

And here's how you can support that process:

Getting involved and making new friends

All of the activities on our summer course - working together, learning new things, being active and meeting new people - are great at helping lift feelings of homesickness.

Initial homesickness usually stops as soon as they make a friend on the course. So we ask you to help us encourage your child to join in the activities and talk to the other children so they can start focusing on fun and new friends.

Remind yourself and your child of all the good reasons for attending English Country Schools.

Remember that they are safe in a beautiful school in the English countryside, surrounded by caring, friendly people who want your child to be happy and make a success of their stay. With your help, we can achieve this.

Communications

If your child is homesick and calls you more often than you feel is good for them, remind them of your telephone agreement (see above) and arrange a call in a few days' time. If this is difficult, you can keep in contact with text messages between calls.

A homesick child may write or say things like: “everyone hates me”, “I can’t eat anything”, “I lie awake all night” or “I hate it here”. They are expressing that they are upset and may say almost anything to convince you of the need to leave. If your child expresses worries or concerns, please contact the school to find out how your child really is and to make sure we are aware that they are feeling homesick.

If your child is upset, please contact us so we can provide extra support if needed and so we can feedback on their behaviour in classes and activities.